Join Us

Hello, friend. I’m a zombie.

Yeah, yeah. I know what you’re thinking. I should be all “BRAAAIIINS!”

Not all of us are that uncivilized. As a matter of fact, you know I’m right. You’ve been listening for days and haven’t heard any groans or shouts of bloodlust, have you?

No, you haven’t. We’ve missed you. I remember seeing you during the first few days of the infection. You would dart in and out of your kitchen, gathering cans and whatnot. I saw you and was sad you didn’t want to come join us.

Sure, we were a rowdy bunch back then. We went around yelling and hollering for blood. We were a near-mindless horde, hell-bent on eating anyone or anything that got in our path.

But now, it’s been weeks and we have changed. We’re smarter, faster, and stronger than we ever were alive. We are the next evolution of humanity. I want to share this new life with you.

I saw you again today, sitting at your computer, looking at your email. You’re hoping for good news aren’t you? Well, this is the best news you’ll get.

It’s been over a month. Surely you’re tired of being cooped up in your room. Don’t you want to come outside? Don’t you want to be a new man? Don’t you want to join us? Be one of us? Go outside?

Come on. You have to be out of food. I know you have to be almost out of fuel for the generator I always hear chugging away out back. Surely it’s going to get to you. You’ll realize I’m the sane one here. You’re going to lose you mind anyway.

Why not come out with us?

I will be watching you read this, maybe from inside your house again. It’s only a matter of time. Join us.

Hear that? It might be me. Join us.

You’re losing your mind anyway. Why not go outside. Yeah, it’s safe to go outside.

You’re just rationalizing now. Don’t even bother hitting send. You can hear us out there. Join them. What other choice do you have? Do I have? You shouldn’t have locked yourself in here for so long. You should have been taking the medication. But enough of that. Time to go outside.

Join them.